00:00
00:00
homor
Self-published independent author, writer and avid enjoyer of stupid, popcorn entertainment. Always happy to help!
"We all have a thousand bad drawings in us, the sooner you get them out the better." - Chuck Jones.

29, Male

Writer

The Shadow Realm

Joined on 11/11/05

Level:
17
Exp Points:
3,200 / 3,210
Exp Rank:
15,236
Vote Power:
5.94 votes
Rank:
Police Officer
Global Rank:
16,480
Blams:
26
Saves:
564
B/P Bonus:
10%
Whistle:
Garbage
Medals:
704

homor's News

Posted by homor - June 23rd, 2010


Jack effin' crap.

Guess what i found out today~!


Posted by homor - June 11th, 2010


A chapter so fantastic, it took five months to write!

[Chapter One]
[Chapter Two]

Space is a desolate and unpopulated place aside from earth, the universe as we know it is completely devoid of any life or living organisms. however, space "as we know it" is almost nothing, despite our best efforts, we humans have been completely unable to observe more than the smallest fraction of a fraction of the entirety of space.

The possibility of life beyond our world is slim, as the miracle of life and creation is an incredibly rare occurrence, but given the fact that space is astonishingly (to put it lightly) large, the possibility of life on other worlds is actually quite reasonable.

Doc Strange has always beileved this theory, being an amazing scientist as well as a powerful Superhero, he was always ready to believe in the impossible and the Strange.

This was the the entire reason he came to space in the first place, with trillions of planets and millions of species, there had to be a planet out there that reached Human-level sentience, and if a species has the ability to feel and think critically, than they had the ability to destroy and fight, and the need for a Hero, because it was certain Earth no longer had that need.

But for now, he was simply drifting, simply hovering around a depleated asteroid field near a burnt out star.

Doc would have no trouble with travel, Alosun (the potion he originally drank to give him his powers.) gave him the ability to travel faster than the speed of light, it also changed his inner anatomy, making things like rest and eating more for pleasure than anything else, and most importantly, it gave him the ability to survive in the airless vaccum of space by allowing him to breath in Space, probably the only real health issue was that he was unable to shave or groom himself, growing a manly stubble on his face.

The only real issue for Doc? the crippling loneliness. by leaving Earth he had left everything he ever knew behind, his Friends, his Family, they were all gone by now. he knew it wouldn't be problem, he would only be in Space for a year, but they didn't help with the powerful feeling of emptiness.

He had been in Space for 3 months now, he had traveled many light years and had yet to find anything but unpopulated Asteroids and Planets completely devoid of any life whatsoever.

However, like many things in Doc's life, this was about to change.

As he flew, a great explosion rumbled behind him, sending shockwaves all over his body and knocking him away.

He looked behind himself to find some kind space ship following him, shooting lasers in every direction around him.

"By Thor's beard! what is this?!" Doc shouted, shocked.

Doc didn't know what was going on, but he knew he had to put a stop to it, he flew towards the strange UFO fist-first, ready to destroy it. it didn't work, his fist merely bounced off the metalic space-craft.

An Alien voice blasted over the intercom of the Ship, the voice was speaking some kind of strange alien language Doc couldn't understand, it reminded him of the Germans.

"Look, whoever you are i don't want any troub-" before Doc could finish his sentence, a dart sprang out from one of the ship's cannons, hitting Doc in the neck, and knocking him out.

Doc awoke an unknown amount of time later, strapped down to a slightly rusted metal table, Doc struggled to get out of his restraints, but they were made of some kind of unearthly technology that made him unable to use his powers.

That didn't stop him from trying, however. he shook his wrists in the metal cuffs that bond him, and he tried as hard as he possibly could to slide his legs out of their cuffs, but it all failed.

After about 20 minutes, he gave up.

Doc looked around the room, there was some kind of odd glowing Orb floating above him that lit up the room in a blue tint, there were no visable doors or windows anywhere, the ceiling was littered with strange devices that sort of looking like Cameras, someone was watching him.

"Listen here, whoever you are!" shouted Doc into the Dark. "i don't know who you are or what you want with me, but you'd better show yourself right now if you wanna work this out!"

Doc could hear faint voices whispering to each other in that same language from before.

Just than, an Alien Creature teleported in.

He was barrel-chested and rather burly, his skin was a dark, mustard colored yellow and he had a single shoulder pad on his right shoulder, he had a visor on his left eye and a silver, robotic looking breastplate and a black sash around his torso, he had pincers of both sides of his mouth and his entire lower body was Snake-like. in his left hand he held a gun-like syringe, and some kind of strange bracer covered his right wrist.

"Xigara mornax Quarza grannga echram?" said the Other-worldly creature.

"Wha...what?" asked Doc, however, it was clear that neither he nor the Alien could understand each other.

The Alien slithered up to Doc and put his hand over Doc's mouth, holding his head down, and injected the stange liquid within the syringe into Doc's neck.

"There, can you understand me now, Human?" said the creature.

"What the? what did you inject into me?!" shouted Doc.

"Relax, whatever-you-are." said the Alien. "what i just put into you will translate all your speech and all the speech you hear into a low frequency that can be understood by anyone."

"How could that EVER work in any scientific way at all?" asked Doc.

The Alien was at a loss for words.

"...Anyway..." said the Alien. "my name is XayaX, second in command to the great conqueror Areccil."

"If you're his second in command, why are you doing grunt work like interogating prisoners."

Yet again, XayaX was left without a word to speak.

"...It's not important." said the Alien. "what is important is that you answer a few questions so we can make sure you aren't a possible threat."

XayaX tossed the syringe aside and press a button on his Wrist bracer, created a holographic keyboard, most likely used to collect data and make notes. XayaX began typing with a notable speed as he talked to Doc.

"Question one: what is the name of your species?"

"On my planet, we call eachother humans." said Doc.

"Question two: what is the name of your planet?"

"Earth."

XayaX became wide-eyed as he abruptly stopped typing on his keyboard. XayaX turned away from Doc as he pressed another button on his Bracer. another hologram was generated above it, this one was an orb of static.

"Lord Areccil? we have a problem." said XayaX.

The Orb of static morphed into a Fly-like head, it was the head of lord Areccil.

"What is it, lackey? did i not tell you i would be in my harem for a good 30 Giga-Cycles?" said Areccil.

"We have a problem sir, the captured creature is claiming to be from Earth."

Areccil was silent for a good 2 minutes, dotting his eyes around and stuttering, trying to find the right words to express his disbelief.

"I'm coming over there right now, Xayax."

The Holographic projection ended, and within an instant Areccil teleported into the room.

He was a Strange looking bug-like Monster, he had a a Bug-Like head nad was clad in a long Black Robe, he looked like a humaniod Moth and had Moth Wings on his back.

"I am here Xayax, what is the problem again?" asked Areccil.

"This...THING claims to be from Earth." replied Xayax.

"That's impossible! Earth was scientifically examiened 2000 years ago, it was found to only be in it's 7th Para-cycle!"

"But according to what we scanned from his mind, his species is already in it's 9th Para-cycle!"

"I refuse to believe it! no species could evolve that fast. by your mathematics they'll be as advanced as MY race in only 1000 years!"

"Xxcuse me..." said Doc. "But what is a Para-cycle?"

"A Para-Cycle is what we messure a Planet's evolutionary worth by." said Xayax. "so if your Planet was in it's first Para-cycle, you would be nothing but a bunch a of Cavemen."

"This is a serious problem! the humans are no-where NEAR as Advanced as we are, but they're growing faster than any race we've ever seen!" Areccil said, a noticable worry in his voice. "what if they learn to Collide Hadrons?!"

"I wouldn't worry about that sir." Xayax said. "these Monkeys are far too stupid to handle such a complicated task, by the time they come close they'll all start crying and screaming about how it's going to kill them all."

"That isn't good enough for me!" replied Areccil. "i want him Thrown into the Dome until we can figure out what to do with his Planet."

"The Dome?" asked Doc. "what heck is that?"

Xayax pressed a button on his bracer, extending a syringe from it.

"Tou'll find out soon enough, Human." said Xayax.

Xayax stuck the syringe in Doc's neck.

Doc Attempted to speak, but whatever was in him had made it's way into his mind, his words became frantic and muddled as he struggled in his bonds. his eyelids grew heavy as his head slowly began to stop jerking around.

Finally, everything went black.

Doc was completely knocked out, there was no Dream, no Nightmare, nothing but the bitter song of Silence, and the Eternal painting of Blackness.

Nothing, there was simply nothing.

"Hey, hey buddy? you alright?"

Doc slowly began to fade out of his trance, as the words of someone he had never known before rang through his ears.

"Come on, get up." the voice spoke. "i know it's eaiser to sleep through this crap, but you gotta do things like eat sometime, you know?"

Doc's eyes slowly pried themselves open as he took in his surroundings, sitting infornt of him was a deformed gray Creature, a rather scrawny looking thing, with shriveled skin and Large, pur Black eyes with no Eyelids.

Doc looked around himself, he saw that he was in what could pretty much be described as a massive Slum, buildings made from broken and watter-damaged wood, trenchs filled with some kind of green, sewage-like slime.

Around the broken and tarnished make-shift buildings and the reddish, dust filled atmosphere were hundreds of Alien Creatures, odd looking beyond anything any Science Fiction writer could fathom, Monsters with multiple limbs and tentacles, eyes upon eyes upon eyes, legs of every possible kind.

The many Creatures looked beaten and hopeless, stumbling and slithering around the Wasteland, some simply lied on the ground, trying to shut out the horrors around them, there was a large ditch on the far side of the slum, filled with the dead bodies of the many lost prisoners.

Surrounding this complex of misery was a large, transparent Dome structure, obviously, this was the Dome that was mentioned previously.

The small, gray Creature continued to speak to Doc as he sat up.

"How's it going there, buddy? you've been out for a while." said the Alien. "we were just about ready to throw you into the pit."

"Wh- what's going on here? where am i?" asked Doc, observing his surroundings.

"You're in the Dome, buddy. the worst place in the Galaxy." The Alien Creature replied.

"See, Areccil took over his home world by-- wait, you don't mind a little exposition do you?"

"huh?"

"Nevermind, anyone who can't handle it can just skip over this next 2 paragraphs."

"See, Areccil, the guy you probably either met or heard about, you being in here and all, took over his home Planet after his Father was murdered by Rebels, after that, he cracked down on the rebelion and ordered the living Rebels to be exiled to a Domed meteorite, he tossed in a couple of resources and left them to their own devices.

Ever since than, Emporer Areccil has streched his hand out to all the other Planets in this Galaxy, sending anyone who tries to fight him here, into the Dome."

Doc Strange stood, his knees aching with an intense pain he brushed away a little dirt from his shirt.

"So, when's my trial?" asked Doc.

The Alien was visably amused.

"Trial? buddy, i don't think you get it. we don't GET trials, you're stuck here for the rest of your life."

Doc looked quizzically at the Alien.

"Well, i certainly can't STAY here. i have Friends i need to get back to." Doc told the Alien.

"No, you aren't getting me, you CAN'T leave. EVER. there's no way to escape, the Dome is impenetrable."

Doc immediately walked over to the nearest part of the Dome's wall and Flicked at it with his Index finger.

The ground rumbled as a Massive hole was stuck through the glass-like Dome shielding, cracking the wall half-way towards it's other end.

The Alien creature stood in awe.

"Impenetrable, huh?"

The Alien stood there, his mouth gapping wide open, his bug-like pitch-black eyes wide open.

"We'd better--"

Before Doc could finish that sentence, an Alarm began to screech and howl like a chrous of dying banshees.

Small Space Ships closed in on the area, pouring out robotic Imperial Guards, the batallion quickly ran through the massive gap.

The Imperial Guards scouted the area and found nothing as the starved and weary peasents ran for cover. Doc and the strange grey creature had all but completely disappeared.

"What the hell was that?" Asked one of the guards.

"Relax Unit 254a, it was probably just another gas explosion." The Guard Captain told his flustered companion, attempting to make the situation seem less dire than it actually was.

Meanwhile, under the cover of the shadows of a rotting and half destroyed slum house, Doc Stange and the Creature look on as the Imperial Guards began to collect glass shards, take pictures, and write up reports on the incident.

"Wow, they came pretty fast." Remarked Doc.

"They ALWAYS come pretty fast." The Alien informed Doc. "Anytime they sense any kind of disturbance they come in about 20 seconds with a million Troops, there's almost never a problem in the Dome, no one ever tries to get out, no one ever starts a fight. you're the first person I've ever seen so much as raise a finger to try to get out."

"What do you mean? were you born here?" Asked Doc.

"Yeah." the Alien Creature told Doc. "See, Areccil took over my home Planet and slaughtered my people, but than he went out of his way to collect as many of my species eggs as possible so that he could have another speices of slaves, the useful ones are either put to work or sent to become Imperial Guards, but the useless ones are sent to live the rest of their lives in the Dome."

"How can anyone treat people like this?"

"Some people are just assholes." said the Alien. "Their actions can't be explained, their motives are completely unclear, but they like to hurt people for the sake of hurting them. They like to cut and stab thier flesh because they think it's their's to cut and stab. They like to bend and break our bones because they think it's their's to bend and break."

"That's Areccil in a nutshell, really." The Alien wrapped up. "Just an asshole."

A certain somberness swept through as Doc let what the Alien had just old him sink in. A silence crept through.

"So, what's your name anyway?" The Alien asked.

"My name is Doc Strange." Said Doc. "Your's?"

"My name is M'art*ganagaga-Expork^nikaraka&igababa #Wakranty." Said M'art*ganagaga-Expork^nikaraka&igababa #Wakranty. "In my native tounge, it means 'Little Trickster.'"

"Err, right so how is that pronouced?" Asked Doc.

"Y'know what? just call me M'arty." said M'arty.

"Okay." Stated Doc. "So what's our next move?"

"I have no idea." M'arty replied. "I was hoping you could come up with something, you're the first person who I've ever seen try to escape. You're the first person who told Areccil 'no'."

"Well then, Just follow my lead." Doc reassured M'arty. "Now, how long will it take them to repair that hole?"

"I've seen them take hours and hours to repair the smallest little holes and cracks caused by meteor showers. This could take 'em a hole week to fix."

"That's just enough time for us to strike."

[To Be Continued...]


Posted by homor - June 6th, 2010


'Cause he's the night.

Batman yells at a box of kittens.


Posted by homor - June 1st, 2010


So hey...

It's time to rock.

.
/* */


Posted by homor - May 22nd, 2010


Your challenge is to write crossover fanfiction combining Space Ghost and Bill Nye the Science Guy The story should use murder as a plot device!

Ghost Planet:

On it's surface is a certain innocence, nothing more than rocks and surface of soulless gray and craters of little more than black nothingness, a lifeless husk of nothingness, the size of a mere meteor, it barely qualifies as a moon, let only a planet.

However, much like a man lost in his own corruption, Ghost Planet holds a deep layer of lies and filth beneath it's soullessness. A layer where death and decay are merely the norm, a layer where the wicked and the foolish triumph over the meek and the heroic, a layer where the prose is a deep, dark purple.

Our tale of lies and hate for today takes place within a seemingly humble Television Studio atop the soulless husk that is Ghost Planet. The 28th season of "Space Ghost: Coast to Coast" is about to finish up filming it's season finale.

"Welcome back, dear viewer!" Space Ghost says to the camera as he sits at his desk, his gentle but masculine George Lowe voice giving us all a feeling of warm invitation. "Now that we're done with my 84 minute monologue about why i deserve a green lantern ring more than Hal Jordan is over, we can finally begin with tonight's guest! Please give a warm welcome to Bill Nye the Science guy!"

The television monitor that contains every Space Ghost guest ever slowly pans down, in it's mocking, pretentious glare we see the dead body of Bill Nye, impaled in the torso by an iron pipe.

"Welcome to the show Bill!" says Space Ghost, oblivious to the fact that there's a motherfucking iron pipe in Bill's torso.

Bill Nye's corpse, unsurprisingly, gives Space Ghost no response.

Space Ghost, still ignorant to the fact that Bill Nye's corpse has is covered in it's own blood and has half it's face smashed in, it's brains leaking out and it's glasses cracked in half, proceeds to continue to wait for a response.

Space Ghost sits there, completely silent, waiting for a reply. The cold wind of Ghost Planet blows across the forgotten Television studio's massive window as little more than the airless silence of space gives Space Ghost his long awaited reply.

Space Ghost's face never draws away from his ignorant smile of obliviousness as the corpse of Bill Nye slowly rots away every second. The cold, dim light of the television screen

This seriously goes on for about five minutes.

"Wait a minute..." Space Ghost says, something finally clicking in his empty head.

Space Ghost stands up and proceeds to rub his hand all over the Television screen.

"My god... He's dead!" Space Ghost finally realizes.

"Maybe he decided to kill himself somewhere around the 45th minute of your speech about how Hal Jordan is a yellow belly coward and you're the super cool big kid of the sandbox." Said Zorak, sitting inside his piano prison.

"First of all: I did not call Hal Jordan a yellow belly coward. I clearly said he was a cry baby mama's boy and liked to smell his own butt." Said Space Ghost. "Second of all, No one kills themself by impaling their torso with a pipe and beating their face in. I know that for a fact, I've seen CSI."

"You watch CSI? Since when?" asked Zorak.

Space Ghost was brought to a confused silence.

"...Gee Zorak, that sounds like a question that..." Space Ghost proceeds to look into the camera. "A MURDERER would ask!"

Zorak didn't really respond.

"...A murderer would ask you when you started watching CSI?" Inquired Moltar in his control room.

"Yep, that's exactly what a murderer would ask!" Space Ghost responded. "In fact, i'm completely convinced Zorak killed Bill."

"Alright, let's assume for a moment that your assumption is correct and i did kill Bill Nye," Said Zorak. "What, may i inquire, would be my motivation?"

"...Well i don't know." Said Space Ghost. "It just... sorta seems like something you'd do."

"Hmm, actually that DOES totally seem like something i'd do." Said Zorak. "But i DIDN'T do it, not this time anyway."

"Oh..." Said Space Ghost, taking Zorak's word for it. "Than who did do it?"

"I guess we'll never know." Replied Moltar.

<The End>


Posted by homor - May 18th, 2010


nahhh


Posted by homor - May 9th, 2010


COME ON AND GRAB YOUR FRIENDS

WILL GO SEE VERY

DISTANT LANDS

JAKE THE DOG

AND FINN THE HUMAN

THE FUN WILL NEVER END

IT'S ADVENTURE TIME


Posted by homor - May 3rd, 2010


Aquaman.

Simply because he's rather unpopular, thus making me edgy and counter-culture.

Also the new cartoon version of him is badass and voiced by Bender.

My Favorite Superhero Is...


Posted by homor - April 27th, 2010


Hey guys, sup?

CAD edits!

Obligatory Weekly Blog Update is go


Posted by homor - April 21st, 2010


Blarg

AND THAT IS WHY YOU CANNOT HAVE THE ROLLER SKATES