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homor
Self-published independent author, writer and avid enjoyer of stupid, popcorn entertainment. Always happy to help!
"We all have a thousand bad drawings in us, the sooner you get them out the better." - Chuck Jones.

Age 31, Male

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some facts about the norse god Odin.

Posted by homor - September 14th, 2007


1. Odin's tears cure cancer. Too bad odin has never cried. Ever.

2. guns don't kill people, Odin kills people.

3. there is no theroy of evolution, just a list of animals Odin allows to live.

4. the chief export of Odin is pain.

5. Odin never sleeps, he waits.

6. Odin has two speeds. walk, and kill.

7. the leading causes of death in the U.S.A are 1. heart disease 2. cancer 3. Odin

8. there is no chin under Odins bread, only another fist.

9. Odin drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.

10. Odin never goes hunting, Odin goes KILLING.

11. When Odin calls 1-900 numbers, he doesnt get charged. He holds up the phone and money falls out.

12. Odin once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.

13. Some people like to eat frogs' legs. Odin likes to eat lizard legs. Hence, snakes

14. There are no races, only countries of people Odin has beaten to different shades of black and blue.

15. When Odin was denied an Egg McMuffin at McDonald's because it was 10:35, he roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a Wendy's.

16. Odin can't finish a "color by numbers" because his markers are filled with the blood of his victims. Unfortunately, all blood is dark red.

17. An Odin-delivered Roundhouse Kick is the preferred method of execution in 16 states.

18. When Odin falls in water, Odin doesn't get wet. Water gets Odin.

19. Scientists have estimated that the energy given off during the Big Bang is roughly equal to 1ORhK (Odin Roundhouse Kick)

20. Odin doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.

21. In honor of Odin, all McDonald's in Texas have an even larger size than the super-size. When ordering, just ask to be Odinsized.

22. Odin CAN believe it's not butter.

23. Odin can divide by zero.

24. The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Odin has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.

25. When Odin talks, everybody listens. And dies

: /shameless copie paste job.

some facts about the norse god Odin.


Comments

thor > odin

and loki > thor.

I don't know who odin is... Now where is my free beer and porn?

Odin is the father of thor.

oh, and were all out of both.

at least half of these facts are about chuck norris...thus all the roundhouse kicks...Odin died in Ragnarok w/the rest of the norse gods...Fucking Chuck Norris Lives!

THEY'RE ALL CHUCK NORRIS FACTS, THIS IS A PARODY!

also, when Odin dies the world ends so, yeah.

AAAGGH!!! TOO MANY WORDS!!!

if you're going to go "TLDR" on me......you could have atleast.........

ok, you post was too long, i didn't read it.

TLDR.

Funny little parody you made! At least im lightening up a bit! Rather than these other Black souls!